I am sick of all this spam! Help!

Question:

"Tim, 


I have used the e-mail address provided by my ISP for years, and have been battling an ever more daunting tsunami of tspam, since the day I began! Finally, it has become too much! I'm dumping my ISP's e-mail, and I'm going to make a new one... but I don't want to lose touch with any of my friends. 
How can I make sure that my new inbox stays free of spam, and that my old friends can still get a hold of me?"

Click "Read more" to see the answer.

My computer catches fire, and Facebook is trying to kill me.

This question/answer was obviously a joke, but just for laughs, I responded anyway.

Click "read more" to see the whole thing.

Question:

Dearest Timmeh:

Every time I start my computer it catches fire. Then silver haired monkeys jump out and travel back in time and try to abort my great-grandfather while my great-grandmother is making coon skin hats for my uncles.

"Application failed to initialize properly" (0xc0000005 & 0xc0000022)

 Problem:

Hey Tim!
[...]Here's my issue: I am using Windows XP. SP2, and I keep getting this error message that application failed to initialize properly (0xc0000022). lots of programs on my computer are failing to open! i cant open my antivirus either to check if its a virus but i dont think ive downloaded anything recently...
[...]the problem happens with lots of different programs including "uistub.exe" when i try to open my ****** antivirus, ccapp.exe, oscheck.exe, pifsvc.exe, etc etc etc. [...] what do i do!?!?

-Anonymous

Solution: 

Hello Anon; Thank you for providing the 0x***... error code!
There are two common reasons for the manifestation of this problem. One is a particular issue with a Microsoft patch that occurs only in XP SP2 (which leads me to believe that this is likely your issue since you have XP SP2) - and the other is a particular virus. Luckily, I think I have a solution for both.

Click "Read more" for the solution!

Something is slowing down my computer...

This question was asked on a forum, and I was going to write my response there, but I thought I ought to post an update anyway; so I'm replying here.

Problem:

"I was using my laptop last night and it started to go slow so i restarted.
When i turned it back on it was extremely slow and pretty much unresponsive.
When i go to the control panel it says that the cpu usage is 100%
i didnt download anythinbg and i wasnt watching porn when this happened.
I have windows xp btw."

Response:

If your CPU usage is at 100%, that means that a process is eating up all your processor cycles, so nothing else can do anything.
I won't be able to diagnose this problem fully without more information, so let's start with figuring out what process is using all that CPU time.

• Step 1:Press CTRL+SHIFT+ESC to open Task Manager
• Step 2: Click on the "Processes" tab.
  
• Step 3: Just below the list of running processes, you'll see a check-box, labeled "Show processes from all users". Check that box. (You may need to accept a UAC prompt, if you're using Vista or Windows 7. Click continue if it prompts you.)
• Step 4: Just above the list of running processes, you'll see the title row. Above each column, you'll see "Image Name", "User Name", and so on. Click on the column label: "CPU" so that it's sorted by HIGHEST CPU usage. (You may have to click twice).
  
• Step 5: You may see that it jumps between several processes using the most processor time. Write down the information in the "Image Name" column for processes that seem to be on the top the most, and also write down, on average, how much CPU they're using (The value under the CPU column). 

Site news: Instant chat.

A new feature has been added.
When I am available, you can chat with me directly and ask any quick questions you have, right through the website, without having to wait for me to return your voicemail, or email.
Type in the window to the right of this page, to get in touch with me directly.

Chkdsk keeps running every time I restart my computer

From a forum user;

Problem:

On XP pro 32 bit, I un-installed some programs, and now chkdsk runs every time I restart the computer.

Explanation:

Click below to see a long explanation

When you do a chkdsk and ask it to “/f” or “/r”, it should state that it needs to un-mount the drive to do a chkdsk unless it's in read-only mode (That means no /fixing or /repairing) - It asks you if you want to do it after reboot. If you say yes, it switches around the bootexecute value in your registry, under “HKLM\system\currentcontrolset\control\session manager”. (We’ll be getting back to the bootexecute value at the bottom of the article.)

This change (on the next reboot), calls a program just like chkdsk but that operates earlier in the boot-up and doesn't require windows be loaded. This module is called autochk.exe, and it is what's responsible for un-mounting and scanning the drive before you boot up. This also happens when a drive is found to be “dirty” by the system.

When you say "yes, do this on my next reboot" by typing “Y” and pressing enter when chkdsk asks you, you're basically 'marking' the drive as 'dirty' manually. This is what calls autochk.

(NOTE: Autochk, unlike chkdsk, can't write to the system logs directly because windows hasn't booted up yet, so it will instead wait until it's finished and write a log file to the root of the C: drive, which is then written into the application event logs by winlogon.exe - so if you want to see the resultant logs of an autochk scan, look in the error logs for any entries made by winlogon.exe)

The command (the context of which I'll research whilst I type this sentence... done!) to UN-mark the drive as "dirty" is "chkntfs":
So here's what you do...

Solution:

First, you need to open a command prompt with Administrative privileges.
-In xp, simply click the start menu, then RUN, then type "cmd" and hit enter.
-In Vista and 7, click the start menu, then type “cmd”. Right-click the icon at the top of the search field, and click “Run as Administrator”, then accept the user account control prompt.
Once you’ve got command prompt open, just type one of these commands (in bold, below) depending on what you’d like to do. (Click "Read more" for more information.)

Sound, Power, and/or Network icon disappeared from my system tray.

From anonymous user. This was a unique problem, with an interesting solution. It’s never the first thing you’d think!
Problem:

“The system tray will not show standard system icons for volume, network, and/or power. Standard troubleshooting has failed me! Please, Tim’s Tech Tips, help me! (64-bit Vista Home Premium, all updated completed.)”

Attempt #1:

Let’s try this first – Simply right-click on a blank area of the taskbar, and then click on Properties. Once there, look to the bottom of that window. Do you see the check-boxes for the icons you’re  missing?

Response:

“That was the first place I checked, but in that window, all of the check-boxes are grayed out (pic attached). I’ve checked audio settings and everything, in control panel… no luck! :-(“

Click "Read More" for the continuation

Site Update: Old Posts are New Again!

Most of the old articles of T3 with videos in them have been updated to working video links. Sorry for taking so long to get on this. Everything should work now!!
(We had to switched hosts)

Enjoy!

Some old stories that were updated:
T3, Episode 1: Speeding up your computer, using MSConfig
T3, E2: How to cheat at Minesweeper in Windows XP
T3, E3: The "Net User" DOS command, and how to use it. (personal favorite)
T3, Episode 4: How to “Hack” your Windows Password.

Capslock is off, but everything is in caps... and highlights everything when I click!

From user: ABUALTAI

Problem:

"I have a problem with my computer. it will caps lock without pressing the caps lock key and on the desktop when i select any icon it will sellect or the icons on the right side and above how to solve this problem"

Solution:

You have sticky keys or something along those lines turned on.
To deactivate it, try one of the following:
Tap shift 2 times in a row. (This turns off StickyKeys specifically, but there are other accessibility options which can be turned off by doing the following.)
Hold shift and control at the same time for one second.
Hold both shift keys at the same time for one second.
To turn the feature off, open your control panel and go to accessibility options then select the settings for all 3 of those options and turn it on, hit OK, hit apply, then turn it off, hit OK and hit apply, all one-at-a-time. I don’t know why, but windows sometimes doesn’t like to accept the change unless you do it that way.

Alternatively, your shift key is physically stuck. :-P

Hope this helps, Abual!

I keep hitting F5 in Firefox/Internet Explorer but it opens a “RUN” dialog!

This was a tricky little problem that came down to a sort-of-hardware-issue. This guy was hitting “F5” to refresh the page in his web browser, but it wasn’t working. Here’s what happened
The problem:

When the user hits F5, they get a box like this one:

The standard Windows “Open File” dialog.

Click "Read more" for the solution!